Therapy is a big investment — emotionally, financially, and energetically. And like any investment, you want it to pay off. The good news? There are things you can do to make therapy more effective and meaningful. Time and money are limited resources. When we’re putting these resources towards something, we want to walk away feeling like it was worth it.
Here are some tips to ensure that you’re getting the most out of therapy (or coaching) and that both your time and money are well spent.
Come with an Agenda.
You are the expert in your own life. Therapy works best when you have specific goals and concerns that you want to work on. We will always set goals at the beginning of therapy and I’m
happy to guide a session but I cannot possibly know what has occurred in your life in between sessions. When clients come into therapy with something concrete they want to focus on, we can make progress more easily. This approach helps us spend our time on the right things. Take notes of issues/challenges/conflicts/difficulties that arise in between sessions, this can become your ongoing agenda.
Put in the work outside of session.
You cannot expect to see change if you only put in effort during our sessions. No one is building muscle lifting weights once a week for an hour. Therapy is exactly the same. In order to see actual progress you need to be implementing the tools and strategies on a daily basis. The equation for change is applied pressure over time. If you want to get the most out of our time in session, do the assigned homework outside of session.
Tell the truth, even when it’s scary.
The desire for social acceptability is real and it extends into the therapy room. The more honest you are with me, the better I am can help. The therapy room is truly a space of non judgment. Most likely whatever you are going to tell me is something I’ve heard before. Don’t waste your own time and money giving me the version of events you think makes you look good or that you think I want to hear. I can handle the truth and you can too.
I have a deep desire for every client I see to be successful in the changes they want to make. The truth is that for therapy to really be effective, you must want success for yourself even more than I want it for you. Put in the work as well as the resources and you will see the change.
Live your width,
Jessica Small, LMFT 